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Lemme get 2 grey gooses.
Wait. Lemme get 2 grey geese.
That ain't right either.
Fuck it. Just get me a flock of vodka.
Educate your fuckin self on the situation before you open your dumb ass mouth.
Off is the general direction in which I wish u would fuck
ur luck is so bad u could jump in a barrel of titties & come out suckin a dick
Do NOT, I repeat, DO NOT feed the trolls today. Lift her up in celebration and may your block hand be strong, swift and steady.
Happy Father's Day, seahorses. You're the only male species that gives birth. To a thousand babies at a time. Respect, mah nigga.
Lil Mama is waaaay too manly. Come in the bedroom like, "Yoooooo, son. Word to my muvva. I'ma suck ya dick OFF, son!"
I like when men are aggressive. Like, "I want you. I'm gonna have you. You're mine now." and MEAN that shit. No games.
"Y'all really dating people you meet off twitter?"
Uhhh. Yeah. Cause they're actual people. Like. Why you so weird?
i don't make mistakes. i make memories.... bitch.
My daughter told me I'm getting too good at lying. Fuck that bitch. I do what I want. Also I don't have a daughter.
92% of girls that tweet only a simple smiley face either just got dicked down real good or found a 50% off shoe sale
Q. What's the difference between love, true love & showing off? A. Spitting, swallowing & gargling.