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My pillow gets head , my chair gets ass and if I'm lucky I get a star YAY !!!
Some tweets make you smile , some chuckle or fall down all laughing .Then the rare ones are like they pulled that tweet out of your soul .
My sexual preference is ...often .
Twitter is like a truck stop , you think you're gona run in there for a second and your ride leaves you ...
Before sex , you help each out of clothes n all . After sex you dress yourself. Moral once you're fucked no ones gona help you
Baby it's not cheating if I don't swallow right ?
We say Twitter is not RL but some of you shared with me your pains , fears , your joys and life changing moments seems pretty real to me ..
A quiet man is a man in deep thought .
A quiet woman is a ticking bomb .
A gentleman never ever tells but his smile does .
I'm mentally trained to be here . I have a degree in sarcasm . But my specialty is bullshit . I'm not cheap, I charge by the star .
Never underestimate the power of a woman's heart to let go ..
Here I go again on my own , like a drifter I was born to walk alone ..and then there was Twitter .
Officer I have perfectly good explanation for speeding , I have tourette syndrome in my right foot .
You broke it , I picked it up and made a beautiful collage . It's not the same or perfect but it's still me and always will be .
Crap , my pussy has a 5:00 shadow !
Taking these meds and bottle says do not breast feed while on them , going to have to call one of those nursing maids for my BF .
It doesn't matter what you tell yourselves darling tweeters the reason we are here , we are all filling some hole in ourselves fun or not .
You can lie to your lover , mother , priest , who ever , but if you lie on Twitter they can smell you a mile away , except allergy freaks
My bad that I didn't tell my BF it wasnt my nipple he was sucking on last night in his sleep , oh well I needed that pimple squeezed