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There are two kinds of people in this world , those who think Adam sandler is funny ... And intelligent people.
I'm so dumb, I only just signed up for favstar.fm ... The people at work were sick of me trying to tune it in on the radio.
Just had a wet T shirt comp with myself and won
I'm so ugly that when I go to the park, dogs sniff my face.
What does cheese say when it has it's photo taken
I have a really cool tweet to post about windy weather...
I'll tweet it later.. I saved it as a draught.
they say that doing it with your opposite hand is like someone else doing it,
i tried,true,it's just as bad as when someone else does it
Whenever I go to bed with a new bloke for the first time.. Just to lighten things up I say ' welcome to the fold'..
I'm so ugly, I make artificial flowers wilt
It was just like taking candy from a baby... Because I was, and I enjoyed every fucking mouthful..
Everytime I burn food ... It ain't burnt ....
It's CAJUN.. Okay?!
My knees hurt!
On the upside:
I think I got the job.
What is the symbol for the element of surprise?
I've been looking into it and it turns out the possibilities aren't endless after all. Sorry folks.
Today I feel every bit the 47 old year bisexual crack addicted homeless man that I'm not.
I'm so ugly I make onions cry
I'm so awful at sex, my partners have to yell out their own name as they climax...
I think I must be one of those girls that only a " trusted family friend " could love.
Revenge sex is a dish best served:
I'm so bad at giving bj,s that my brother put a lock on his bedroom door
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