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I'm a girl. Silly and emotional is what I do.
Who are you calling a tart?!
Me? Oh, why thank you!
He bruises me in the most delicious ways.
Boyfriend: honey, I apologize, you were right about that.
Me: *brain explodes*
Convinced bucket seats and middle consoles were created to cramp my road head style. Challenge accepted motherfucker. Challenge accepted.
I wish you could see yourself through my eyes, feel my heart and truly understand what you mean to me. Words can't touch it.
Boy, you're broken in a million ways and you leech love and affection like a black hole. Of COURSE I want to date you!
People who finish every statement with 'just saying'. I know, because you were just speaking and it's annoying as fuck.
Giving a blowjob is like sucking the life force out of a man.
How utterly delightful!
Sext: looking forward to bouncing on your cock later.
I'm just looking for a man who'll take my temperature when I'm sick...rectally.