@giromide's (pantsless) most faved Tweets...
STOP PUBLISHING FUNNY TWEETS SO I CAN CATCH UP WITH ALL OF THESE APPRECIATION NOTES I'M WRITING! MY WRITING HAND IS CRAMPING!
A slang word for player is playa. Playa means beach. Beach sounds like bitch. Bitch ends like sandwich.
Now I'm hungry and confused.
Now I'm hungry and confused.
Points were just scored in the sports contest I am watching! This excites me positively or negatively!
Typical President's Eve at home. Leaving milk, cookies, and a plantation owner's brain near the fireplace for Zombie Abraham Lincoln.
My wife, five minutes after I removed my sandals, "I'm surprised cartoon wavy lines aren't coming out of your feet."
Half of my Facebook friends applaud Scott Brown.
The other half jeer him.
Mom announced her bountiful harvest in FarmVille.
The other half jeer him.
Mom announced her bountiful harvest in FarmVille.
Buh?
NBC says there will be comedy airing at 10/9 Central this fall, but that's when Leno's new show will air.
I bet he's gonna be pissed.
NBC says there will be comedy airing at 10/9 Central this fall, but that's when Leno's new show will air.
I bet he's gonna be pissed.
Lifted the toilet lid to find poop in the bowl. Either someone before me forgot to flush or this toilet is from 5 seconds into the future.
Method Man owes less than $40,000 in unpaid taxes.
Somewhere, Willie Nelson is laughing.
Because he's very high.
Somewhere, Willie Nelson is laughing.
Because he's very high.
I'm a bitch. I'm a lover.
I'm a child. I'm a mother.
I'm a sinner. I'm a saint.
I'm a Shaker. I'm a Freemason.
I'm a toaster. I'm a Dyson.
I'm a child. I'm a mother.
I'm a sinner. I'm a saint.
I'm a Shaker. I'm a Freemason.
I'm a toaster. I'm a Dyson.
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