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PROTIP: Buy delicious chocolate chip cookies for office. Call them 'lactation cookies'. No one will touch them, so you can eat them allllll.
I'm wearing ck one cologne, so if you don't want acid flashbacks of your high school crush don't come near me.
is there medication for the anxiety i feel when my phone battery is below 30%?
If you're happy and you know it clap your... Actually, keep it to yourself. No one cares.
RIDICULOUS DILLEMA: I love tuna salad, but only when it doesn't taste like fish.
if no one in the world has yet named their pet dog/cat/hamster 'scaramouche' then we should all be fired from life.
When people ask me what I've been up to lately, I'm going to start responding "whitening my teeth".
I just realized I never chased waterfalls. Feeling ashamed that I let TLC tell me what to do.
malls are my kryptonite.
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