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Sometimes I swallow mints because I forget they're not drugs and I'm a fucking mess.
@stephanieokc
I feel like Allison should have been socked in the face a lot more, just because of her weird face. pic.twitter.com/cp5ZtF3BWU
I want to be having the kind of day you're having, random guy chuckling out loud to himself.
The default wallpaper on the desktop of my life is a stock photo of me rolling my eyes.
Really inspired by @metalligretch to take on the day with a bit of quirky eagerness to remain casually aloof.
Watching people go to their safe place as they ride a crowded elevator adds joy to my life.
Pressing all the correct buttons at the gas pump is all the level of challenge I can handle today.
@kevnasto tweets give my day a much needed I'M AWFUL FOR LAUGHING AT THAT to my day.
If you can't handle Whiskey, you can't handle Duane Barry.
Just kidding, let's totes go out & party ;)
It's when the bf's hangover is worse than mine that I start feeling better.
@gorrdano tweets give my day a much needed WHERE THE FUCK DOES HE COME UP WITH THIS SHIT to my day.
;)
*sips Drano®
His face may be what attracted me initially, but it's the way he makes me smile that keeps me hooked.
Sex. Sex is behind that smile.
Miss @bigbec43, you just made my morning! :)
Hungover here, so nothing clever to add.
:-|
Sharing my bed with the bf is pretty awesome cos I get the edge all to myself.
BRB, I gotta get jabby for a sec.
The lighting scheme in my apartment is designed around a theme of despair to match my scowl.
@jtswhipped
Your latest avi is so gangsta, it makes me want to steal things. Oh wait, I'm brown, so never mind.
An international man of mystery with a constant yearning to boogie down.
