I'm so racist. I wouldn't go in the next aisle at Walmart because there was a group of Mexicans.

@potsc Seeing peoples pictures and stories on Instagram brought tears to my eyes. It reminds me how beautiful life is. #potsc

All I want in life is to be creative, travel the world, love endlessly, experience beauty, and face my fears.

You know you've seen Hot Rod too many times when you want to go to the woods and punch dance your frustration out.

I have a love/hate relationship with the human race.

This picture always makes me giggle. pic.twitter.com/NcC6qWwo

I am eternally baffled by the fat guy with a hot wife phenomenon.

@ang_klln I still remember one night at Ryne's when he was drunk & said, "Is that the ice cream man? Cause if so, I'm fucked!" Lol.

I've always believed in creation but I think reality shows are proof of de-evolution.

I think one day I'm just gonna go driving and whenever I find a pedestrian, I'm going to look real angry, point at them and mouth, "You!"

I don't think there will ever be a time when I don't want to choke most teenagers.

In tonight's episode of Vikings, Ragnar asked his god who will bear his son. I very happily raised my hand.

Heard a girl in Walmart say, "Bitches is stupid!" Yet another success story from the WV educational system.

Warmer days bring thoughts of running away to the woods. If you want to find my heart, it is on a mountain, in the trees & in the earth.

Seriously the best thing about spring! RT @brians_baby: Holy custard batman Berkshires is open!

Go on darlin'. Keep randomly grinding on those guys. They'll totally respect you and value you.

When I grow up, I want to be an adventurer.

Spoiler alert: The title A Good Day to Die Hard is misleading. There were like 56 dead guys & 0 erections in the whole movie.

There's something about a scruffy, stubbly beard that makes a man way more attractive.

I think it's terrible that nobody will pay me to take naps.