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@mulaney I was laughing at one of your videos & my friend said, "don't laugh at him, thats mean! She thought you had downs syndrome. Sorry.
Most of my spare time is spent whispering evil things to the objects I trip over.
How are yoga pants not pants? How are leggings not pants? What exactly is your definition of "pants"?
I HAVE THE WORST LUCK OF ANYONE I'VE EVER KNOWN. I'M CLUMSY AND AWKWARD AND DUMB. BRB PUNCHING MYSELF IN THE HEAD. UGHHH
I had a dream that I was the girl in the new Transformers movie. SPOILER ALERT, apparently she has a baby and dies in a plane crash.
Why would I want to “act like a lady, think like a man”? In my experience, most men are not very smart.
My sister just told me, "Chelsea, don't be sad. You have money." and handed me $500 in monopoly dollars.
My favorite thing on Vine is hearing someone whisper, “go!” at the very beginning of a video.
Hey I don’t think you would be speaking to me like that if you knew I had 19 followers on tumblr.
“what’s up?” think chelsea think….. “not much.” GOD CHELSEA YOU’RE SUCH AN IDIOT YOU BLEW IT
It took TEN YEARS for Ross and Rachel to get together on Friends. I can't take ten years of Nick and Jess. I. Can't. Take it. #newgirl
I started to do push ups but when I got to the floor I just laid down and took a small nap.
Kate Moss said, "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels." So she's obviously never had Doritos.
Trying to think of a good Twitter bio. I just know there should be something about beyonce in there.
Most costumes I've been looking at online have the words "sassy" or "flirty" in the name and are nothing I would ever wear in public.
“My eyes are blue sometimes, but they change color-” No. No they don’t. They don’t do that.
I'm not really sure
