The biggest twist in The Dark Knight was when Julie Andrews came in and told Catwoman she was a princess. Mind. Blown.

Life of PI is basically Calvin and Hobbes on a boat.

I have the body of an animated Tim Burton character. #ladies

FIVE MORE DAYS TILL CHRISTMAS

Just HASHTAG everything #BellLetsTalk even if it's unrelated. Each tweet is 5¢ to mental health charity!

Sleep is for the week. All week. I will sleep all week.

Why is @dtbroughton not performing at the #closingceremonies? He's way more British than Ed Sheeran!

There are some things you cannot unsee. #PORM

#EOMGrad2012 The only day of the year (other than Halloween) where we get to dress up like dementors.

I dunno what Lucky Stiff is, but the excerpt was amazing! #CCCGala

Some tweets #get ruined by unnecessary hashtags.

#NEBRASKA made best of fest! Come see the top three tonight at 6 @artscourt #youthinfringement2013

This is one of the best hockey games I've ever seen. #sens

.@oc_transpo MISSED CONNECTION: Short blonde girl on 96, bus #4646 or 6464 IDK but we ALMOST TALKED I and I want to get to know her more #RT

Texting bus stop numbers and routes to people is the new pocket dialing. #octranspoproblems

Does it look like the guy wearing a knitted scarf and toque, carrying two antique suitcases wants to support your frat?

I'm going to pretend to laugh at this Homeland sketch because I don't watch Homeland. #SNL

.@oc_transpo an empty 96 marked mistakenly marked "out of service" drove past me and I missed my wife give birth. Refund?

High school classes are over! I'm gonna miss all (most (a few)) of you!

#NEBRASKA IS AT 8:00 NOT 8:30 GOD PLEASE DON'T SHOW UP AT 8:30 COME AT SIX OR SOMETHING PLEASE RT #youthinfringement2013