between the new daft punk and the new arrested development, white history month 2k13 is off to a good start

Zach De La Rocha in front of the Whole Foods Salad Bar thinking re:lunch "WHAT BETTER PLACE THAN HERE, WHAT BETTER TIME THAN NOW."

Sext: I play with the small constellations of freckles on your back, for this is the galaxy I want to be lost in.

Life is Meaningless *serves Froyo* Existing is suffering *adds Sprinkles* All I Want Is Death *smears cool Whip all over face* Art is Dead

Joe Biden walks into the situation room, clicks on the boombox;Space Jam theme starts to play and mouths along *Y'all ready for this*

If you really think about it ‘cockblocking’ should just be redubbed to D-fence

Grandpa_solemnly_twerking_to_usher_love_in_this_club_feat_chuck_e_cheese_animal_band_at_my_21st_birthday_party.avi

✔ Single　✔ Taken ✔ I like to mark checkboxes

*Jeff Mangum Voice* IIIII LOVE YOU TWITTER DOT COOOOOOM

*elmo voice* hahaha, but do you even lift, brah?

Going thru life as the awkward instrumental break in a karaoke song

They're showing jurassic park III; a story where some white people visit an island and get killed by the natives. Happy Columbus Day y'all.

Girl,
I want to
Whisper
Things
In
Your ear
That
Would normally
Require citation
In
Wikipedia

*walks into conference room; the clicking of camera shutters is deafening* I am here to make an announcement: I’m a virgin who can’t drive.

Some of us are just in a hurry… to live *eats an ice cream sandwich with the wrapper on*

I think I met @dril today, nbd pic.twitter.com/gd1RaYu1

*gets caught frenching a breakfast burrito* if you like it so much why don’t you- *i solemnly raise my hand to show the ring*

#ThankYouMatty pic.twitter.com/nIKbA0QsUE

An uncontrollable urge to grind your teeth into fine dust, because sometimes we’re too distant even in the same room.

*Soaks is a bathtub full of marinara* G*ddamn I'm saucy as fuck tonight.