@hisnamesLen's most faved Tweets...
Take your shiny silver shirt back to whatever future you came from and advise your fashionistas that this office just isn’t ready yet.
Fresh batch of college interns have arrived. I’ve been assigned my own little cutie to take under my wang. Yes, I meant “wang”.
“How’d you get that mark on your forehead?” “NOT from sneezing and banging my head on my desk while picking up an M&M. Definitely NOT that.”
Time to mess with the ex-girlfriend and change my facebook relationship status again. Head games, 2.0.
The next woman to ask me what I do for a living gets an earful of my Amway pitch. And a fantastic deal on water purifiers.
“How do you know you don’t like candycorn if you’ve never tried it?” “I’ve never tried penis either but somehow I JUST KNOW.
Everyone, let's slow traffic to a crawl and watch the man change his flat tire. Our passing empathy is what he needs right now.
Boss is on maternity leave & I'm working from home. Don't know why I'm still looking over my shoulder at a cardboard cutout of her in labor.
To hot IT chick: state your intentions before crawling underneath my desk. Next time I won’t be so hasty in unzipping my pants.
Guess who stood behind me as I read an email regarding a “surprise baby shower for the boss”? Yup. Gary from receiving. I don’t like him.
Bumped into Prince Harry outside the Burger King on Delancey. One of us was wearing a paper crown. Awkward...
Some of you rely on your kids for the funny & some of you - your pets. I have Smitty, my oven mitt. Say 'hi' Smi.. no? Ok.
Finally got her to stop humming. Amazing what a polite slap upside the head can accomplish. But now I have the yelling. Fucking rude.
The day YOU sway around the restroom in a floral dress and sing along to Lisa Loeb’s “Stay” is the day WE have something in common.
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