Popular Recent Faved By Given
Friends: 256
Followers: 863
Favs Given: 1,645
Favs Rec'd: 964
@holman's (Zach Holman) most faved Tweets...
holman
Whenever someone asks me to explain Twitter, I punch them in the dick, yell "HASHTAG!", take off my pants and run away.
@holman
holman
I think at least one child was left behind, at some point.
@holman
holman
Landlord's showing my apartment today. Think I hid the coke and dead hookers, but pretty sure I left an algorithms book on the table, dammit
@holman
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Tymethiefnonsequiturificcleapowcoachbaby4aklwelizabitecloudya01shanalizzyBeauBocksha_sugaNikiWithIssuesrandomfreakurbanprojectzholmanprettygirlmasonshariv67
holman
All of these apartments on craigslist are described as "CHARMING, COZY VICTORIAN".

I'm really just looking for "BADASS PUSSY PALACE".
@holman
15
Dolanitecoachbaby4oclafcirecloudya01el_panterashanalizzyBeauBocksha_sugaNikiWithIssuesphilhavensurbanprojectzpinkysupprettygirlmasonpedshariv67
holman
Why do we shred cheese? Why not pull cheese? Or mildly massage cheese apart into pieces? Our culture is mean.

Ha ha. Culture. Cheese.
@holman
14
TymethiefcrackbarbiecleapowIsJonasBlue_Crabiamnotdiddycloudya01BeauBocksha_sugaNikiWithIssuesurbanprojectzprettygirlmasonWeiszkleeshariv67
holman
So for the seven of us that are both nerdy *and* vain, here, get your @favstar on the command line. http://github.com/holman/stars
@holman
13
Favstarmarkonensam_symonswiiebyailibrynmorgan8CThingfulNeedsbrianicusSpinchangekiske_shariv67aklw
holman
It feels like fewer and fewer spammers have been following me lately. Maybe I should show more leg.
@holman
13
cristianlafoolishwitaklwritamartinicleapowlexidextrioussha_sugaNikiWithIssuesfactualfictionBeauBockprettygirlmasonWeiszkleeshariv67
holman
Look, I know I swear in my damn tweets, but 725 of you still following can't be wrong. Well, 724. Shit. 719. Fuck! 682. Assbandit! 815.
@holman
13
TymethiefelizabiteImAVeronicaritamartinicloudya01el_panterashanalizzyBeauBocksha_sugaNikiWithIssuespinkysupprettygirlmasonshariv67
holman
Apartment hunting is like finding the perfect girl. Your standards eventually droop to "well, is this too dirty for sleeping?"
@holman
12
BeauBockaklwafoolishwitoclafciresha_sugaIntrepidDNANikiWithIssuesphilhavenspinkysupprettygirlmasonshariv67mattgillooly
holman
Yo I heard you need more cowbell, and imma let you finish, but All Your Base was the best- ah, christ, just typing this is damaging my soul.
@holman
12
sncdslaklwcleapowabrahamveghcloudya01BeauBocklexidextrioussha_sugaNikiWithIssuescristianlprettygirlmasonshariv67
holman
My twenty-something liver agrees with AT&T's slogan of "more bars in more places".
@holman
12
nonsequiturificoldjoesmithreallycloudya01ruthakersafoolishwitBeauBocklexidextrioussha_sugaNikiWithIssuespinkysupprettygirlmasonshariv67
holman
Way too many people use ellipses inappropriately...
@holman
11
cloudya01cleapowmandaHNKanasoulMorrosBeauBocklexidextrioussha_sugaNikiWithIssuesWeiszkleeshariv67
holman
I'm getting too young for this shit.
@holman
11
crackbarbiecloudya01abrahamveghDieLaughingcristianlel_panterasha_sugaNikiWithIssuesprettygirlmasonshariv67mattgillooly
holman
My hair is now long enough to shake dry, like a dog. This means less towel usage, which means less laundry. BACHELOR LIFESTYLE FOR THE WIN
@holman
10
TymethiefIsJonasafoolishwitBeauBocklexidextrioussha_sugafactualfictionprettygirlmasonWeiszkleeshariv67
holman
Read properly, my twitter stream of all of you reads like a greek tragedy.

Read improperly: a MacGyver-themed discotheque in an earthquake.
@holman
10
ChiNurseDolaniteanasoulafoolishwitritamartinisha_sugaNikiWithIssuesBeauBockprettygirlmasonshariv67
holman
Tried to remember if a black dress shirt is work appropriate. Then I remembered, shit, *I'm* not work appropriate. All good.
@holman
9
cleapowTymethiefafoolishwitabrahamveghritamartiniBeauBocksha_sugaNikiWithIssuesshariv67
holman
I don't even think more cowbell could help this.
@holman
9
snackajaweaanasoulcloudya01JeeNeeBeeBeauBocksha_sugaNikiWithIssuesfactualfictionshariv67
holman
Umbrellas are weak. I carry a huge funnel over my head and redirect the stream towards undefended underbellies of umbrellaed citizens.
@holman
7
IsJonasCotypulsanasoulestonurbanprojectzshariv67
holman
Walking around a bit in spite of illness. I'm pretty sure I saw this in the beginning of a House episode.
@holman
7
MorrosBeauBockafoolishwitsha_sugaNikiWithIssuesfactualfictionshariv67
holman
I'm not saying the bachelor lifestyle is inherently lazy, I'm just saying that... oh, whatever.
@holman
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afoolishwitvinnieleafandscreenrandomfreaksha_sugaNikiWithIssuesshariv67
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