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*An Icelandic cop knocks on a door* "Mrs Jónsdóttir? There's no easy way to say this. Your husband fell into the volcano Eyjafjallajökull."
"Did you fuck the pig?"
"I won't dignify that with a response"
"Tell me about your offshore interests"
"It wasn't a whole pig."
Cop pulls me over
"Do u realise how fast u were going?"
"OH MAN,U WERE LIKE ＮＥＥＡＷＷ"
*cop runs off holding imaginary steering wheel*
DAVID CAMERON GOOGLE HISTORY:
- What is Ebola?
- Can you privatise Ebola?
- Can you blame Ebola on previous govt?
- Ukip Ebola policy
Easter, Hitler's birthday and 4/20 all on the same day? Somewhere there's a Christian Nazi stoner with a lamp and no wishes left.
[US Airways meeting]
American Airlines just got a 14yo girl arrested. How do we compete?
*social media manager pulls out USB stick & winks*
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