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i feel lost/boring
Have you ever killed two birds with one stone? I feel terrible. Those birds never did anything to anyone. Poor birds :(
Have you ever noticed how good hugs feel?
HEY What's everyone up to tonight?! I'm going to hang out at home and watch family feud! My life is good and I would not trade it for death!
There's this really sad dude laying in my bed right now and his name is me.
Is there a How to Get a Cute Girl to Like You For Dummies?
Seriously I'm tired of knowing that cute girls exist. Seriously just cut me in half and throw me in some lava. Seriously.
A duck wearing a tux with a martinni. He says his name is Pond, James Pond.
Ughhhhh i love girls
I don't know how to become happy.
MY LIFE IS A JOKE I WROTE
I will pay you $200 to be in love with me.
I hate myself but that's okay.
I got some salsa in a cut on my thumb and I'm thinking it should kill me.
i dont know what time it really is
What's you're favorite party smell?
i keep digging myself graves thinking the next one will be better but i realize now that they're all just holes in the ground