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I've never wanted to be cat...until now.
If you think she's cute, let her know. Maybe she needs to hear it just as bad as you need to say it.
"I consider Nickelback a curse word."
"Nobody masturbates to love. Nobody suffers from being horny." Bull. Shit.
So there's this girl...
Clean up on aisle 69.
I almost feel bad about the vicious eye fucking this sweet girl is about to get.
Accidentally burped Chinese food in her face and lived to tell the tale. I promise it was an accident.
My safe word is a string of expletives screamed while kicking her square in the box.
I just had the hottest onesome. Now, sleep before the sun comes up. G'nite.
A little inspiration...
"No matter how slow you go, you are still lapping everybody on the couch." - Unknown
If a girl walks in and carves her name on your heart, do you turn and walk away?
These underwear are HOT! No really, my junk is sweating. Time to get naked.
I am exactly who you think I am, except when I'm not. It's then that I'll become your worst fucking nightmare. kik: iantollewellyn