I HAVE A BIG BLACK COCK! 99% of you just misread that. I'm not black.

I wish I could throw water at my poo for all the times it's splashed back at me...

Hey Beliebers, shouldn't you be the slightest bit happy for your God's girlfriend for winning Favorite Breakout Artist? Just a suggestion.

@free_facts i totallie agree i alwas tell my freinds tht but they nevr believ me now i hav pruff thnx

You want me to rape my daughter? RT @irespectfemales: GUYS: treat your lady the way you would want your daughter to be treated,

I will not have any motherfucking goddamn swearing in my household you little shitfuck asshole titty 4-year-old! #gositinacorner

You're obviously not a man. RT @irespectfemales: #ucanthaveme if all you want is SEX! there's more to me than just sex.

@pleeeasehateme I wouldn't, because you're the best at it.

"Maybe the "LOST" series could've been avoided if the pilot had just asked for directions!" #WomenTalk

"Suck me, beautiful."

My jokes are getting really graphic and disturbing while they're just making penis jokes, I'm #winning this game.

"I've never been so happy to hear the French!"

I love black people because when they suddenly appear and rap in a white girl's bad music video it makes the video MUCH better.

You don't need a safe word when you're wearing a helmet.

#FF @fremarsh because he soaks in a douche and came up with the best porno name ever, "Just In Bieber's Bum"(still haven't forgotten that!).

#FF @fremarsh Because (yay!) he didn't delete his twitter and "Just In Bieber's Bum", the porno title he created, is the best thing ever.

Today, Death Note and RIP JUSTIN BIEBER trended. Fucking awesome day.

@pioneersprod and his dad. Again. http://twitpic.com/25n0jp

We can now all know what REALLY happened to @pioneersprod 's car. http://twitpic.com/1zyod4

@pioneersprod You have a red car. IT HAS BEEN SPOKEN. http://twitpic.com/1zympb