Why the fuck has nobody made a limited edition Star Wars electric wok called 'The eWok'?! Yeah.

from the makers of dr pepper comes professor salt, an extreme combo of sea water and tuna fish CAN YOU HANDLE THE FLAVOUR

#whyilistentometal Because I'm a rebellious teenager who secretly wants to murder people in the name of Satan

Poppy the Ice Cream Bandit http://t.co/pxAgIAeC

I'll be live-tweeting the removal of 11 years of hair growth at 1pm tomorrow. Follow #dreaddeath for all the gory details. RT OR DIE

@taiganharris You can lead a horse to water, then you can have a cool horse pool party #ProbablyFacts

@duvalmagic Do you (or GBX) plan on releasing a statement regarding the A:CM debacle? I think that gamers and fans deserve an explanation.

But seriously, #whyilistentometal because its cool as heck and dudes are all RARRR ROOARR DUN DUN DUN WEEEE and I totally identify with that

ATTN MELBOURNE: I have 2 x tickets (free) to the At the Gates show at Billboard tonight. Who wants them? PLEASE RT! #AtTheGates #Melbourne

Welcome to 2012, where Batman looks like a Transformer, Robocop looks like Batman and Battleship is a film. Now punch yourself in the face.

I calculate that if I stand in front of the microwave everytime I make food, I should develop super powers by the time I'm 340 years old.

Best thing I've seen all week: Kid in a Devourment shirt scream "PANCAKES" and punch himself in the head in the middle of the mall.

Dreamt I met a girl named Kimberhay. My favourite part was when I said to her "Did someone walk in halfway through your parents naming you?"

"Dad, why do they call it Death Metal?" WELL SON, PROBABLY BECAUSE *jaw unhinges as snakes fall from my mouth and my eyes burst into flames*

"OH GOD, GIANT MECHA-BEES! CAN YOU HEAR THEM?!" - Me, trying to terrify someone who doesn't know what Clipsal is, just now.

HOLY FUCK, THAT NAILS ALBUM

Start a band called 'Who Even Gives a Fuck Anymore' and it's just Miles Davis' 'Bitches Brew' played at 1/2 speed over sloppy gravity blasts

So I heard P!nk's new album is way experimental, just and hour and a half of someone wringing out a used tampon into a mike with sick reverb

@bugbucket @hell_homer @losdrogas @rev_revolver @g0m AIR HORN

Hidden feature in iOS6 - push the home button 666 times to activate secret paperweight mode omGz