There are two kinds of people in the world, those who think they're normal, and those who know there is no such thing.

Twitter: where obsessive-compulsives go to relax.

I was hot, young and wild once. Probably around the time half of you were born.

I'm kinda bored with admiration from afar. I want up close and dangerous.

Sometimes I can't stand all the bullshit we've created to distract ourselves from just being.

You don't want to chat with older women, fine. Just don't be a rude dick about it. Someday you'll be just a gray/bald dude who uses Viagra.

Life is too short not to share your real self with others.

Some of the shit that gets RTs and 'trophies' blows my mind. I'm not smart enough, stupid enough, or trashy enough to be popular on Twitter.

Sometimes it is exhausting being an anomaly.

Either I need to be treated like I'm the most special woman on Earth, or fucked like I'm the last one ON Earth. Not sure which. Maybe both.

You learn a lot when you pay attention to what people retweet.

Thanks to Twitter, I have a heightened sense of bullshit.

I will never to be too old to dance around the house by myself with the music cranked up to 11.

Ohhh. when you said 'benefits', I thought you meant health care...

Nothing can cast a spell like the depth of your eyes.

If you can change your habits, you can do whatever you want in this world.

I think it's actually easier to be your true self on Twitter than it is in real life.

pic.twitter.com/qrHF53tn

Because Twitter is now only showing video links on my profile pg. Like it doesn't want anyone to see me or something pic.twitter.com/RW4YZpFO

“Beware of the man who denounces woman writers; his penis is tiny and he cannot spell.” ― Erica Jong