Popular Recent Faved By Given
Friends: 550
Followers: 770
Favs Given: 1,647
Favs Rec'd: 553
@jebro's (Jeb Ro) most faved Tweets...
jebro
Dear lady that was walking toward my car and then detoured: I was just cleaning my iPhone screen on my pant leg. That's it.
@jebro
jebro
Damn it, I am a NOUN! Why is no one prepositioning me?
@jebro
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jebro
Yes, coffee shop girl, it IS funny how your cleavage makes a simple question (cream or sugar?) so difficult for me to answer. Laugh it up.
@jebro
12
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jebro
Eww. Did you guys know that hummus was made out of chick pee?
@jebro
10
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jebro
Turns out that cute girl on the bicycle wasn't waving at me, she was signaling a left turn.
So... that was embarrassing.
@jebro
10
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jebro
I though it was nearly impossible to mess up nachos, yet here we are.
@jebro
9
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jebro
Reading some Vonnegut you've probably never read. Smugly, of course.
@jebro
8
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jebro
I don't understand why my Mormon sister gets mad at me for telling her kids they're going to hell for eating shrimp. IT'S IN THE BIBLE!
@jebro
8
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jebro
This birthday party needs less Hello Kitty and more booze.
@jebro
6
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jebro
Making the GPS say "Yes" repeatedly in a bored, monotone female voice reminds my coworker of sex with his wife. And that's why he hates me.
@jebro
6
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jebro
Accidentally leaving out the W when typing in twitter.com is way less exciting than I thought it would be.
@jebro
6
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jebro
New pasttime: castrating the truck nutz on the Super Douchey trucks and teabagging their windshields with them.
@jebro
6
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jebro
I'm giving out Google Wave invites like they're STDs. DM me if you want one.

A Wave invite, that is. I can't help you if you want an STD.
@jebro
6
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jebro
My conservative mom just sent me a religious chain e-mail on the importance of sharing.

I of course replied with: "Socialist."
@jebro
6
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jebro
Dear spring day, I hope you like morning sex, because I'm going to make love to you. Hard.
@jebro
5
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jebro
Thanks for the warnings guys, but I think it's too late. My jeans are already tightening and my beard has reached "ironic" status.
@jebro
5
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jebro
You have to walk past the gym to get to the bar at this hotel, which is nice because it reminds me I'm thirsty & about to enjoy a beer.
@jebro
5
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jebro
Driving downtown always causes me to mutter the most nonsensical threats. "Road closed? I'll close your f-ing road!"
@jebro
5
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jebro
The apex of my life might just be having scored a 105-point word in Scrabble.

No, YOU lead a pathetic life.
@jebro
5
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jebro
It's time to pare down the number of people I follow. Let's start with the low-hanging fruit, shall we? The Hills watchers, raise your hands
@jebro
5
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