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  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    If you're feeling powerless just remember a single one of your turds can shut down an entire water park.

    • 1,203
    • FAVS
    bendymommynicosnuts3aminthemornSkullTherapyAxeholezSkinnieTallstheecheshireRitaBarkley
    • 735
    • RETWEETS
    SkinnieTallsmonteil_kathybrittaknee_LackOfShameCareEg33kikki_kbMeatyMendozaZedRebel
    AlongCameAnjaYesImMattTeeter_TotterxoCAMILLAxosiamondaytiffinysawyershmcpherson17lilgapeach30______deKenstructionFredPollack
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    I probably mumble "are you fucking serious?" to myself about 87 times a day.

    • 857
    • FAVS
    SkinnieTallsCareEg33louloumansfieldyycRoguehandcuffgoddessNicoleroxxu_ProblematicYouTheBlacksmith_
    • 581
    • RETWEETS
    yycRoguehandcuffgoddessalexacustodioNJluckyocotilloTheBlacksmith_BoozieMcFloozyScdavis24Flygirlee
    Screwoff315______
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    Watching The Walking Dead and I caught myself yelling at the zombies to "get the fat guy!" while my mouth was full of cheetos.

    • 950
    • FAVS
    R_WalkingDeadSkinnieTallsAmberAuroraCareEg33LackOfShameNaDeana_TatevinfuryBerrryDLite
    • 375
    • RETWEETS
    DavidWaddleSkinnieTallsChawks4lifeLackOfShamejustwanttobeme3BazarComedylife_suckerjazbeebz
    VividJamermjohnny3cbass2471CarpentersCrack
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    Whenever a bill collector calls I just give the phone to my toddler and tell her it's Barney.

    • 878
    • FAVS
    janesmith4197DedricB82Johnny_rainmanj0hnnyspannseanwhoremounte_carlbendymommylana_manilow
    • 420
    • RETWEETS
    janesmith4197DedricB82bendymommySome1SlapMeDavidWaddleBartoGeocottonscrapsSkinnieTalls
    radtoria__________
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    A Mexican midget is called a paragraph because he's too short to be called an essay.

    • 769
    • FAVS
    CareEg33vinfuryShakenBabyanne_seattleponce_lupeMrMojoRising9PinchiCabron25GothamKnite13
    • 472
    • RETWEETS
    PinchiCabron25stephaniehasBazarComedySobedemonmissalovesitJesstrat__________GoHomeTobyheffroatlarge
    BazarComedymahatmatweeterTightFollowpalokinspazrunsnythemorris23
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    You can't save a damsel if she loves her distress.

    • 665
    • FAVS
    ZedRebeldbgindylesbobizzlecowans_owenvinfuryShakenBabyTerriGaalStarksWeek
    • 320
    • RETWEETS
    lesbobizzlevinfuryStarksWeekLackOfShamelife_suckerUSMClove68CarpentersCrackRoydzW
    lawyerthoughts
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    I have no problem admitting I'm wrong but thank god that never happens.

    • 628
    • FAVS
    NaDeana_TatevinfuryShakenBabyBazarComedyGoHomeTobyStarksWeeklife_suckerjazbeebz
    • 304
    • RETWEETS
    Some1SlapMeBazarComedyblewhelmetStarksWeekjazbeebzbutimstackdPoonWhisperer1TheTalkingPipe
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    I limited myself to 1 alcoholic beverage a day. Right now, I'm about 2 weeks ahead of schedule.

    • 536
    • FAVS
    facaldaquiCareEg33vinfuryShakenBabygeekycookerBazarComedyEmjayMj2GoHomeToby
    • 276
    • RETWEETS
    nvlesparkerSome1SlapMeCareEg33ShakenBabyBazarComedyGoHomeTobyblewhelmetStarksWeek
    pintofdraftDevil_McBourbon__
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    Twitter: where everyone talks about the zombie apocalypse and saving the world but 90% of you are scared of spiders.

    • 523
    • FAVS
    Some1SlapMeCareEg33NaDeana_TatevinfuryShakenBabyaKhalifa101BazarComedydivadeb99
    • 263
    • RETWEETS
    favstar_historySome1SlapMeNaDeana_TateBazarComedydivadeb99StarksWeekFrank_Lopez_123life_sucker
    RuggedlyMansome
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    My bf bought me a mood ring the other day. When it turns green, I am happy. When I am mad, it leaves a red mark on his forehead.

    • 462
    • FAVS
    K__g_nV_g_nHpHubertCareEg33morgmeneshetsNaDeana_TatevinfuryALF_from_TVpurpledegu
    • 234
    • RETWEETS
    HpHubertInvictikaDadandBuriedShakenBabyGryffindor14CrazzzyKenGinGanderBazarComedy
    BazarComedypizzajaynow
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    People who unfollow you cuz they're offended by your tweets are probably the same people who reminded the teacher about homework in school.

    • 421
    • FAVS
    Some1SlapMeKimpulsesgreggoodman77pand__CareEg33orangeraquelnikkilindsey069danielvisme
    • 230
    • RETWEETS
    Some1SlapMeCareEg33StrollerMafianikkilindsey069Boo0ThangNoiSinEssNaDeana_TateDadandBuried
    OkieGirl405itmurray
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    Just trimmed 2 yr olds bangs. If anyone wants a haircut like Lloyd from Dumb & Dumber let me know.

    • 492
    • FAVS
    SomeAngryCuntzackchapalonirvrrnr11DedricB82robthomasbrownElectrowanddiscjockey000j0hnnyspann
    • 143
    • RETWEETS
    janesmith4197FilmatelistbendymommyDadandBuriedShakenBabyBazarComedyStarksWeekOkieGirl405
    JSchabl
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    A stork might bring you a baby but a swallow never will!

    • 398
    • FAVS
    bendymommyDoItWithWoodruraljulestkcoltsfannickschmidt79BrittsBeardGangg_teemanrosekvthleen
    • 175
    • RETWEETS
    DoItWithWoodnickschmidt79cowans_owenvinfuryBazarComedyStarksWeekDi0nysus7Rulerof9
    TheCiscoKidderHalbrader
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    Writing a tweet then deleting it fast feels like tripping in a crowded place then getting up real fast & looking around to see who saw you.

    • 346
    • FAVS
    ZedRebelNaDeana_Tatevinfuryanne_seattleALF_from_TV_jennjennTheJazzybellaSarahsmella
    • 145
    • RETWEETS
    AngeMulhollandDadandBuriedfavstar_historylyssaalovee420Awad_898iona_mccannLndonaficionadoVN_Ruben
    dick_ish
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    I wish some of my co workers weren't allowed in the break room... Because that's who I usually need a break from.

    • 325
    • FAVS
    bendymommySome1SlapMeK__g_nV_g_nNaDeana_TatevinfuryDadandBuriedBazarComedyTheJamesH1
    • 109
    • RETWEETS
    Some1SlapMeBazarComedyStarksWeekAbomBoninyax6mstluvstrinketsAlongCameAnjaJayson_Two_time
    TheCiscoKidder
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    I went line dancing last night!

    Ok, it was a road side sobriety test. Same thing.

    • 277
    • FAVS
    margaretiaguillermocanbaGeoroyoJerriJerri123kmab4lifeJMEDOLZdatgirlmeganlasergirl70
    • 116
    • RETWEETS
    dales872KassMondeVN_Rubenkrishna_vanPhoenixRises69dilz83ThumperPigeonBwanaChris
    BazarComedyMissTirio
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    The only reason I turn on the tv is so its not quiet & lonely when I'm on twitter.

    • 289
    • FAVS
    ZedRebelvinfuryDadandBuriedOkla_ChivetteBazarComedyTheTopO_TheHillStarksWeeklife_sucker
    • 88
    • RETWEETS
    BazarComedyStarksWeekTheTalkingPipeTiffhoney83withanewnameYesImMattameo02benittto7________
    LadyBombs________B0MBS_____________
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    Can you put me on your list of things to do?

    • 279
    • FAVS
    bendymommyvinfuryStarksWeeklife_suckerAPANCHALYPSENOWSoWeirditsCoolmeowsepinkLipLush1
    • 85
    • RETWEETS
    Rcm_78StarksWeekAPANCHALYPSENOWjuansolo1_Luba_Lukovakuusela34AcornManhandyyam
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    I would love to buy a 17th century castle!

    Too bad I'm baroque.

    Hahahahaha......

    Fuck.

    • 255
    • FAVS
    CareEg33WesToGodbgindyhareywrightmacauleeymadi_brooke16jaynecomplainscowans_owen
    • 91
    • RETWEETS
    WesToGovinfuryBazarComedyStarksWeekspidr2ybananaAPANCHALYPSENOWlostinthemomntrustygunter
    Lakeoconeebldr
  • jennalynn518
      Jenna @jennalynn518

    Guys who watch tv with a hand down their pants, I get it. It's fucking cozy down there.

    • 260
    • FAVS
    akissofwordsZedRebeljkbsoldierMaleRNTXGavin229teekay1013Jpro717BrittsBeardGang
    • 79
    • RETWEETS
    ZedRebelcevendueceBrittsBeardGangvinfuryBazarComedyStarksWeekb_neis_n_wandernukachan
@jennalynn518

@jennalynn518

i seent it