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267 DAYS SINCE LAST SHARTING ACCIDENT
*A man walks up and discreetly resets marquee to zero*
sometimes I have a REALLY hard time not wanting to bitchslap the holy fuck out of people.
Hey look, local celebrity Alfredo Torres mentioned me in his @AltDaily article ... TWICE #untzuntzuntz http://altdaily.com/features/entertainment/7053-four-local-podcasts-you-should-be-listening-to-instead-of-kevin-smith-or-chris-hardwick …
RT if you are Spartacus
I actually envy people who judge depression because it means they have no idea what such pain is like. Not even second hand.
Half a mind to report my neighbors for disturbing the peace with their party. Not because they're bothering me but because im a grumpy bitch
I want an app called Blaccuweather that announces the weather to you like a Blaxploitation character. "It muthafuckin hot outside, damn!"
Hey kids! Today's secret word is CUNT! Whenever you see one, scream real loud! Then punch that cunt in the face!
ever wonder why people RT the things they do?
When you put your ear into my cleavage you can hear the ocean. #boobfacts
Natural Born Hater™ ~ Co-Time Lord on @PlayingDoctors ~ EIC of @mouthybroadcast ~ Guest on @DorkTrek. I make t-shirts. Art monkey for hire.
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