Did you know that Bruno Mars wrote "Locked Out of Heaven" after driving to Chick-fil-A on a Sunday?

I baked a Christmas frozen pizza and it tasted like sadness. RT @eatthisnotthat: Retweet this if you baked Christmas cookies today!

I created the GODDAMN Muppets. Please RT.

I'm making a Carrie Mathison inspired cork board tracing all my life problems back to Taco Bell discontinuing the beefy crunch burrito.

Is "Trouble with the Curve" a sequel to "The Paper Chase?" @onlyinlawschool

Does being really scared count as cardio?

I'm at a bowling alley with my development professor and I'm pretty sure he's drunk and I'm pretty sure this is the best.

anytime I start to think I'm meaningless I remember that I held a rally in support of Ashlee Simpson in high school

Tears and Korbel. Same as every year. RT @guygourmet: What's everyone drinking for NYE?

70 hours, 6 minutes. RT @mhfitter: Do 5 pullups, 10 pushups, 15 squats. Repeat 5 times. (The score to beat: 3:45) Tell us your time!

"James, Taco Bell would like to invite you to a paid taste test ($25)." This is all I have going for me at this point.

He must be forgetting Obama has a job. RT @cbsnewshotsheet: If Newt Gingrich wins the nom. he will challenge Obama to 7 three-hour debates

my mom still can't get over how much @brianmcgo looks like Dzhokhar Tsarnaev

three heroes (in order): @laurenkester, @amandabynes and @papajohns

pitchfest is quickly turning into bitchfest

Is steak a vegetable? RT @guygourmet: What's your favorite vegetable to grill?

too fat for skinny jeans. too proud for sweatpants.

hahahaha I hate everything.

It's important to realize that nobody is "perfect." For example: @tacobell sells Pepsi products.

Is being hungover the same as acute morning sickness? Am I a princess?