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First day on the new job!
Lunch w/ relatives all approaching or older than 50 Before we ate they bowed their heads in a moment of silence to check FB on their iPhones
The kids I used to tweet about said that my feed was lame now. I replied that they just aren't as interesting anymore.
Luckily or maybe unluckily for you I have a phone that can post to twitter again.
I post hilarious stuff all the time. Unfortunately its posted to the feed in my head.
Unemployment insurance exists cause there are winners and losers in Capitalism but when job creators lose they move on.
You will never know how many bad tattoos there are until you go a water park on discount day.
Sitting in a meeting room by yourself, clicking through powerpoint slides, is equally ineffective but much cheaper than real meetings
One thing you learn as you rise through corporate ranks is that there are idiots on every step of the way.
Sure, all my co-workers showed up today but not all of them brought their brains.
Meetings: all those words, so little communication.
There is a huge gap in enthusiasm between my gf and myself that tomorrow is garbage day.
Pretend this is a funny tweet about Mondays that hasn't been done before...
see you can't even pretend.