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I post hilarious stuff all the time. Unfortunately its posted to the feed in my head.
Unemployment insurance exists cause there are winners and losers in Capitalism but when job creators lose they move on.
You will never know how many bad tattoos there are until you go a water park on discount day.
Sitting in a meeting room by yourself, clicking through powerpoint slides, is equally ineffective but much cheaper than real meetings
One thing you learn as you rise through corporate ranks is that there are idiots on every step of the way.
Sure, all my co-workers showed up today but not all of them brought their brains.
Meetings: all those words, so little communication.
There is a huge gap in enthusiasm between my gf and myself that tomorrow is garbage day.
Pretend this is a funny tweet about Mondays that hasn't been done before...
see you can't even pretend.
Nobody ever bothers to look at your computer screen at work when you actually have 4 spreadsheets and 3 reports open.
Tech support isn't just fixing ppls problems, it is fixing ppls problems w/o pointing out they caused them themselves.
Best meeting of the day was w/ my GF for her birthday lunch.
There is a very thin line between a company meeting on a conference line and 5 people sitting around playing with their phones.