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Assfixiate: When a man becomes too rowdy at strip club, stripper moves into position & precedes to starve off oxygen in the only natural way
Love rollercoaster's philsophy on life: Have someone else drag you to the hill top & enjoy all the thrills of spiralling downward.
Trying to find quiet place to seriously think about this mooninite war. You know, see all sides of the table. Sadly, both stalls are taken.
Don't worry sir, those 10min spent in the airport mirror perfecting your comb over have been well spent. Rest assured you can now board.
25,300,000 google results for "He's not listening" and I still don't get what she was trying to say. Weird. Oh well, must not be important.
Trying to use TweetDeck to split my feed into poop-joke/non-poop-jokes. Sadly it crashes so often I am left with floaters...
Ever since I wore the belt backwards, nothing has been quite right.
Never realized I was the strong silent type. Without the strong.
I want my Google Wave invite so I can complain about how "pointless" it is. Mostly due to the fact that no one else has invites.
How NOT fun are "Fun Size" candy? What marketing guru thought that was going to work? My guess, he was trying to make up for his "fun size".
Been a couple days without soda. Life feels so flavorless, boring and cold. Like this water i have been drinking.
Michael Phelps turns 15 gold medals today. How many spanks is that? I am asking for a whor... FRIEND of his.
I can't even escape spam email in my f'ing MMORPG! No I don't want goblin sized wood with +5 to endurance.
Web Designer. Lover of pixels, thoughtful design & my wife. In the opposite order.