@jmvanderpol's (Jesse VanDerPol) most faved Tweets...
Assfixiate: When a man becomes too rowdy at strip club, stripper moves into position & precedes to starve off oxygen in the only natural way
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Love rollercoaster's philsophy on life: Have someone else drag you to the hill top & enjoy all the thrills of spiralling downward.
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Trying to find quiet place to seriously think about this mooninite war. You know, see all sides of the table. Sadly, both stalls are taken.
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Don't worry sir, those 10min spent in the airport mirror perfecting your comb over have been well spent. Rest assured you can now board.
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Trying to use TweetDeck to split my feed into poop-joke/non-poop-jokes. Sadly it crashes so often I am left with floaters...
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25,300,000 google results for "He's not listening" and I still don't get what she was trying to say. Weird. Oh well, must not be important.
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I want my Google Wave invite so I can complain about how "pointless" it is. Mostly due to the fact that no one else has invites.
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How NOT fun are "Fun Size" candy? What marketing guru thought that was going to work? My guess, he was trying to make up for his "fun size".
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Michael Phelps turns 15 gold medals today. How many spanks is that? I am asking for a whor... FRIEND of his.
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Been a couple days without soda. Life feels so flavorless, boring and cold. Like this water i have been drinking.
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I can't even escape spam email in my f'ing MMORPG! No I don't want goblin sized wood with +5 to endurance.
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Poor Belgium, don't listen to CAPTCHA! You make wonderful beer and waffles. TOTALLY needed. http://twitpic.com/148tnt
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Stall finally opened up, sat down, noticed there are no feet in other "occupied" stall. What bombing the moon wasn't enough for u people?!
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@nathantwright Instead of Mayors, in Nathansquare u could call them Brown Nosers. Just say the word, I'll make u logos for the trophies! =)
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