You'll never be half the man your mama is

"Shout out to my haters, sorry that you couldn't phase me." ✌

Be careful what you say. You really can't ever take the words back. You almost always regret being mean. You NEVER regret showing love 💘💙💜💚💛

Sometimes I feel like Lil Wayne is rapping about my life...then I realize I have no idea what he's talking about.... #what??

Trying to find a taco emoji or something for cinco de mayo but all the food emojis made me hungry so here's some flan. Happy cinco de mayo!🍮

When will people realize that there is no need to be rude???

Some people just make me smile 😃

Next time I hear someone give someone else a phone number during class, I'm gonna text it and tell them to be quiet.

Gonna rock a positive attitude today!

"I wonder if king size sheets are called presidential sheets in England"

But really, how cute is this kid?!?! http://t.co/NJGLvQqx

@thetennisphenom you found me!!

Ughhhhhhhh. I feel all sicky. 👎😲

And that, my dears, was karma at its finest.

Why do I always forget hair ties when I go on trips? #forgetfulprobs

I hate when people do really stupid things

Sarcasm is a language I speak fluently.

RT“@tinkerbell_: I really really want a sign for my car rear window that reads:

The closer you get
The slower I'll drive
Back
The heck
Off”

#forreals http://t.co/1zokWO9h

I'm not too great at remembering either though.