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Hey California, we got the rain you were looking for. Please come collect it.
Got married, got a new iPhone, spent 5 nights in a cottage, and pet a potbellied pig all in one week.
"Free U2 album" just sounds like a threat to me.
If you ask for two glasses, the room service people will totally think you’re gonna share the bottle of wine.
Some depression manifests as crippling anxiety and fear of doctors. "Get help" isn't always as helpful a statement as you think.
When do I get to start complaining about it being too hot outside?
Now that I’m married I’m going to finally start letting myself go.
Reminder that tomorrow is April 1. If anything especially good/bad happens to you, it's probably just one of your "friends" being an asshole
Halifax friends, remember: http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lgb8hhOLoi1qa1ku2o1_500.png …
More like Daylight RAVING Time, am I right? *flicks lightswitch off and on"
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