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I divided sin by tan. Just cos.
I just rode past a truck with an Obama "O" sticker on top of a Romney one. This is why we treat undecided voters like royalty. #campaignlife
She wears chunky sweaters on daytime television for a few decades, and suddenly Oprah teaches "Life Class"?
Mitt Romney charges his iPhone about twice as often as most people do, because the first 47% of the battery doesn't do anything for him.
Thank you. We're crying and screaming and laughing and thank you!
Just used a winky face. I feel so strange. It doesn't suit me. I'm not a winky-face kind of guy. I'm not that dude.
This waitress tried to pass off Mr. Pibb as Dr. Pepper. And when I inquired, she had the cheek to tell me that they are "alike". Hah!