Online privacy tip: Never give anyone your email address. If you do, they will be able to email you.

"HI, CRATERS!" - Neil Armstrong, 1969

I guess you just can't trust a free service with millions of users who have no clear & upfront plan to monetize these days.

So, yesterday, nearly 4 years after our first date, I asked @ninky to marry me. She said yes, you guys! #🌈x∞

@questlove Someone already beat bikini girl to the punch: http://boingboing.net/2010/11/21/my-tsa-stripdown-vid.html

Yelling "MOVIE!" in a crowded firehouse.

Imma let you finish but Scarface had the best mansion death of all time!

SHOUTOUT TO THE LADY BEHIND OBAMA'S LEFT SHOULDER WITH A FLAG IN HER HAIR

"Well, well, well — look it all the tiny oceans in here." Vin Diesel walking into a laundromat. #VinDieselSunday

@lilbthebasedgod is an unlockable character in NBA JAM.

Give a man a compliment, he'll smile for a day. Teach a man to fish for compliments & he'll be annoying for the rest of his life.

Jan Brewer is in favor of education cuts because dumb kids are easier to trap in her oven. #janbrewerfacts

@xenijardin #PHX's Mayor Phil Gordon has pledged to stand along side #OccupyPhoenix protestors & risk being arrested: http://t.co/O4rt0xnQ

What's the deal with observational comedy?

"Yo, I'm leaving before some t-rex returns for his violin!" - Vin Diesel seeing an upright bass #VinDieselSunday

Marketing to women: " All the Pringle ladies! All the Pringle ladies!"

VADERS GONNA VADE

Oh no. Just remembered that someone in 8th grade wrote "Don't change!" in my yearbook. I've totally changed since then. Shit.

@fucktyler There's a game called Tetris you might like. Then, you can rap about moving bricks.

MySpace's new design has pretty much made MySpace the MySpace of MySpace.