Twitter, seriously, if someone I don't follow and that no one I follow follows, and they mention me with just a URL, it's spam!

Hi, can I aks you a quesshun? You use @omnifocus? You use @1password? Wanna hack your life?

Before you answer… Hi! http://t.co/WihTVJ6A

Hi! Can I aks you a queshun?

You ever miss the Back to Work live stream?

Schedule change? Home invasion?

Hi.

http://t.co/ghMXNp9l

Thought to myself: It’s a little warm in here. Walked up to the thermostat and @nest kicked on the air as I reached for the dial. Smartass.

Hey, kids. You using that @draftsapp? Pretty fancy, huh?

Right?

Why haven’t you rated it and written a review? Do it now.

If iPhoto refuses to update from App Store Updates tab, delete _MASReceipt in app package and refresh Updates tab. Couldn't be simpler!

@hotdogsladies 32A;floppy would make a pretty good master password I think.

Steve: "Why two dock connectors?" Guy: "So you can charge it in landscape mode." Steve: "Get the fuck out. You're fired."

Someone has set the opacity on this poor sorority girl's white shorts to .6.

Wherein I describe the role of @omnifocus and @appcubby Timer in my post-op recovery:  http://cl.ly/0c3Z0t133J0M 

iPhone: Send someone a few text-only iMessages. Then an image. Then more text.
Mac: Launch messages, note order.

Radar #12095448

If you see The Darkness, they blew it.

The Super Bowl cantina scene is not canonical.

The dog apparently thinks my testicles are a trampoline.

Amazing that even in the GM seed of Mountain Lion, full-screen apps make a multi-display environment totally useless.

“God bless you. Anyone who’s happy doing what they’re doing…” —@hotdogsladies

Hi. Can I aks you a question? You ever laugh til you puked? Before you answer… You ever hear @roderickon?




Hi.

Anyone looking for an iOS gig at a small company? I have a lead. Probably DFW area preferred but not certain. Pls RT.

Dear Texas, this is why we can't have nice things: because you'll deep fry them… Also, this is why you're fat. http://bit.ly/b35BK8 #fb

My God if Apple doesn't recognize this is an awesome idea to add to XCode, they should close up shop. http://bit.ly/bzn57P #exaggeratngisfun