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Imagine my amazement when I found out female spelled backwards is sammich
My dad always said "the more followers your have..the better a leader you are." Twitter just blew that bullshit right outta the water.
Just was out at walmart this sexy black chick yelled into her phone "This is why I stick to white dick!" excuse me miss...
Nothing says "Fuck you mom and dad" like bringing home an ugly girl for Christmas dinner.
Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire" was about sleeping with Kim Kardashian right?
There's someone on XboxLive with the username WizKhalifaWayne420_69 just in case you're wondering if the human race is still doomed.
There's a picture on Instagram that says "The purge has started in Detroit I saw pictures of guys with guns."
So...a regular day in Detroit
#GhettoTextSignatures "Gurl please tell me you goin to the club tonight! I'm gin get me some tonight" -- Pr0ud M@m@
2005: Kanye West releases song about Gold Diggers.
2012: decides to date one.
I've got 17 minutes to make it to McDonalds for breakfast, I've dreamed of this day ever since I was a little boy.
Ice Nine Kills is the Ebola of Metalcore.
"Damn girl you're so hot with that cigarette in your mouth and ashtray smell." -- Nobody, ever
Women say some really dumb shit..like "No I won't make you a sammich" and "Ok ok just don't hit me again"
Cleveland gonna be real salty if they pick Kyrie over Enes or Knight...being from dook in NBA is like Penn state in NFL...you're gonna bust
Isn't it ironic Lebron was at the game and Romo quits playing in the 4th?
Bartender. Stand Up Comedian. Former 364 lb Fatty. Underachiever of the Year. Swole Pop Punk Kid. #BBN
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