@lisasho Keep loading your cart with just champagne and chocolate and soon you, too, will have 2 screaming toddlers

in a late tribute to carlin, 7 words that shouldn't be in email: viagra, organ, member, penisole, cum, cialix OR cializ.

Feeling guilty re: shoes bought today.They could feed a sub-Saharan country.Sally Struthers is going to kick my ass, then I'm going to hell.

you know you're older than you think you are when you no longer recognize stars in public service announcements

fear not seattleites! because i now work saturdays & sundays it will be sunny and warm every single weekend...consider it my gift to you!

the ritual steaming of spinach for our child has once again left our house smelling like ass

Dad comes over for dinner, hands me his coat and says, "careful, there's a roscoe (gun) in there." did he think the meat would be that rare?

when will people realize that if you recall a message, everone just skips down to see how you screwed up?

when i say i wish the mother hips would fade from existence, i don't mean the 45 lbs. i still need to lose after being preggers.

used to be fashion conscious, now am just happy to be conscious

wishing i could remember what i did yesterday as well as i remember the lyrics to the Big Red gum theme song from the 70's.