@katefeetie's (Katie Rose) most faved Tweets...
Maine continues to take drastic steps to deny its same-sex feelings for New Hampshire.
Shh, shh, Maine. Just let it happen.
Shh, shh, Maine. Just let it happen.
I like cats because there just aren't enough people who will sit on your lap and lick themselves for an hour. For free, at least.
Guys! Guys! Have you heard of this "beer" stuff? It makes you good at EVERYTHING! Even now, I'm dancing AND crying! At the same time!
Day 2 of Favrd Withdrawal: Attempted to tell joke out loud to real people. Suspect that stopping to count characters ruined the punchline.
She blinded me with science. So I deafened her with history, because damn, some of that shit's boring.
"Work" is a strong word. I prefer to call what I do "spending 8 hours a day being outsmarted by office supplies".
Those little green squiggly lines under incorrect sentences are Microsoft Word's way of saying, "Great job with that English degree, champ."
Beer before liquor, never sicker.
Liquor before beer, in the clear.
Coffee before yoga, don't ever fucking do that.
Liquor before beer, in the clear.
Coffee before yoga, don't ever fucking do that.
I had a dream last night that I was jogging. Not running. Jogging. And taking breaks to catch my breath. Don't aim too high, subconscious.
Edgar Allen Poe walks into a bar. The bartender says nothing. He's been dead the whole time. And it's not a bar. It's a grave. Your grave.
"That's how they do sex changes. Turn your innie into an outie."
"An Audi?"
"...what?"
"They turn your vagina into a car?"
"Nevermind."
"An Audi?"
"...what?"
"They turn your vagina into a car?"
"Nevermind."
I always feel like the most cultured person in the grocery store. Especially since they don't see me go home and Google "how to eat hummus".
Sometimes I wonder if I'd get more done without Twitter. Then I realize I'd just find something else to waste time, like knitting or murder.
I'm so happy to be in London, the most perfect city in the worl- IS THAT A STAND-ALONE CROCS STORE? I WILL BURN THIS CITY TO THE GROUND.
I overcooked my oatmeal. And I accidentally put paprika in it instead of cinnamon. You guys should try this, I'm calling it "Sadness Paste".
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