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Beyoncé better fly in on a fucking dragon or I'm turning off this bullshit awards show.
8 yr old bro: "Can I borrow your phone for a minute?" Me: "Why?" 8 yr old bro: "I want to see if they're still fighting in Afghanistan."
Halloween means LESS THAN NOTHING now that Heidi Klum & Seal are divorced. Tell your children.
How about this? Tell her she is beautiful and hold her hand. Be thankful that there's a woman other than your mom who wants to be near you.
Men complaining to me abt your relationships, two things: 1) Not sure why you think i give a fuck, 2) You're lucky anyone wants to touch you