Basically every Christmas since the N64 came out has been progressively worse.

If your drummer sucks, your band sucks.

Re-think your social media strategy if you're posting anything not related to #watertown right now (unless pizza).

why I'm not answering you: RT @ap: Cellphone service shut down in Boston to prevent remote detonations of explosives, officials say

.@sethdecoteau & I were interviewed by @spinner for a feature on @topshelfrecords. Have a looksee:  http://tpshlf.co/VzO6sj 

*scratches head* *shivers* RT @lukesbeard: Why was MegaUpload really shut down? In December of 2011,… http://t.co/SmA8jr35 via @jongold

If I start a band gonna call it "who cares". Dibs. Band names don't matter. Names for anything don't matter. Gonna name my kid bazooka.

Almost daily, I get embarrassed for someone talking authoritatively about "emo" on the internet. Aware of the irony of this statement.

your band has lyric videos == your fan$ are moron$

I have recently decided I don't like teenagers so I am now old I think.

"I read on your site that you don't listen to unsolicited demos, but I was wondering if you'd like to listen to my new album."

Panera in West Springfield, MA. I didn't order your black bean soup & coffee because it tastes good — fix your damn wi-fi, you Neanderthals.

My resolution is 2560 x 1440.

I wonder what R.L. Stine is doing right now.

@lukeoneil47 it's OK. I'm fully onboard the twitter mediocre topical humor train.

When this all settles, I bet slain MIT officer will be found to've been major catalyst in preventing another huge travesty, perhaps at MIT.

Out to eat to do something normal; forget bombs went off on my street today. Smiling waitresses starkly contrasting the somber TV coverage.

When I'm up late enough to see @cmdr_hadfield tweet "Good Morning, World!" I know it's getting to be past my bed time.

Also, I think we're [finally] announcing the @topshelfrecords (and friends!) #SXSW showcase details today / maybe tomorrow. It's a good one.

Still haven't put pants on today. Infer what you will about my Valentine's Day given this information.