Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
I bet I'd like Trader Joe's if I ever found a spot in their parking lot.
Um why do I have to explain I'm sexy when my bicycle horn can do that for me thanks
I'd fuck the smell of a bonfire if I could.
Shout out to winter for making people want to kill themselves
Kid in class playin the new Call Of Duty on his laptop at the desk in front of me. The teacher could whip her boobs out and i wouldnt notice
Before 9/11, you and your friends could do 9/11s all day long and the cops wouldn't do a thing about it. Not anymore.
i want to put truck nuts on my nuts
<--- not a virgin
I love James Spader so much I'd watch him read a list of my dead friends.
Every sexy woman you see is quietly farting while you're looking at her.
Give me a break, attractive people's cheekbones.
the internet did this to me
My body is filled with weeks of rotting shit.
Son, you awake?
Do dolphins have butts?
"Yeah i think so"
*dad puts his arms behind his head*
"You can't spell 'God' without 'O.G.!'" - cool priest
If a girl gains weight her boobs get bigger but if a guy gains weight his dick looks smaller. How much more misandry must I suffer
don't punish people for their feelings
hello, i have a lot of money in my bank account