Is it proper to sign your Mother's Day card: Happy Mother's Day BITCH?

,@margoandhow Seems like our politicians only support protesters in other countries, but not ours? Funny that.

The President's news conference was not attended by Republicans as they were flying on their private jets to a fantasy weekend at Disney.

House pass bill to increase their salaries and end Social Security and Medicare. Michele Bachmann is beside herself with praise.

Wonder if Prostitutes get "miles"?

This may be my last day 2 b online till I can find the money to pay my online bill. Got caught with no money to pay bills. See ya when I can

I just nominated Ruth Buzzi for "Must-Follow Media Personality on Social Media" #MashableAwards http://t.co/ll2dBbbz

BREAKING: Sarah Palin just announced she will be starting her bus tour again in Iowa She'll be handing out cake to the poor and homeless.

Who ever came up with the saying "There is a time and place for everything" didn't live in todays world.

The re-occurring theme of an inch worm: Are we there yet?

With all the attention the press is giving Arnold's pecker prowess. He announces the name of his new pix "The Poker: A Lust Story"

When not milling around with the upper crust, Beatrice likes to let her antlers roam free. http://twitpic.com/4rqsi5

BREAKING: Scotland Yard reports the pie thrown at Rupert Murdoch was not humble. That is all. Film @11

Nanny McPhee is trending. I must not be the only one watching.

I just some good news. I'll continue to get unemployment for about 10 more weeks. It's not much but at least a little while looking for work

,@crocpunch Dear IRS agent, I'm a Tea Bagger and need to claim my maid, but how do I do it if she doesn't have a SSN? Can I make one up?

Sarah Palin has announced she will not run for President. She said "It just doesn't pay enough and I want to get paid and paid well".

Recent reports of a meteor in Scottsdale, AZ were false alarms. It was just Christine O'Donnell. She accidentally lit her broom on fire.

Dad's car broke down yesterday and he had it towed to Snappy Pappy's Tow In Tow Out Repair. Now it's bouncing with some tight new rims.

Boehner takes to the air to talk about raising dept ceiling. He was late due the time it's taken him to edit his version of 'Mein Kampf'.