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Next generation: do me a favor and stop signing up for Wall Street. Go into the sciences, okay? Science is WAY COOLER than greed. Thanks
The most important quality I look for in a man is he's got to have a sense of humor about his enormous cock.
Jay-Z: "Babe, please leave the part out where I come too fast on your dress in the limo. It's embarrassing." 'Yonce: "No."
So proud of this show, and Alex! So much love to Gravity Fall's wonderful fans, you're all the best. https://twitter.com/_AlexHirsch/status/667843799129812992 …
Do I just buy bananas to watch them die?
I know racism is rampant, but I wasn't aware until recent events just how proud some people are of their racism. We have a LONG way to go.
Hey Michaels! Now's your chance to DESTROY Hobby Lobby. Run with this!
To wildly successful starlets who get asked if they're a feminist and they say no b/c they've never noticed inequality: STOP IT.
The Seagulls won!!!!
I've said it before: Happy Father's Day! Dads, you are literally Mother Fuckers. Thank you!
I would like to make a push that we never release the name or image of the mass shooters, just identify them as "Monster."
Comedian, actress, writer.
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