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My husband is laying diagonally and my cat is at my feet. Now I have to decide who to strongly push over and then pretend to be asleep.
Odds are the middle aged lady who thinks it's cute to say Valentimes Day repeatedly is probably spending Valentine's Day with her cats.
"I'm checking for any lesions or bruising on your head. Your hair is very soft so that is really good." -med student "Good." -me
Scarlett gave Elliott a random ATOMIC wedgie & then quietly said "No thank you" and walked away. Sometimes I wish I was her. #2YrOld #4YrOld
Sometimes you just have to lock yourself in your bathroom and eat a chocolate bar secretly. That's real parenthood.
This shall be our new life/family goal “@burywite: I want one of these so, so badly.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0JZszqC7mk&feature=youtube_gdata_player … #AmericanFotoplayer”
I'm playing a 23 year old at work tomorrow for a pharmacy case. My self esteem is preeeetty high right now.
"Those guys smoke like a fish. Just all the time." -my stepdad
"Are there side effects to these antibiotics?"-me "No, none. Well except for like, just sudden diarrhea/vomiting."-very casual pharmacist
I make my money by pretending to be sick for a college filled with student doctors. I also really like nachos and Disneyland.