Poor, addicted to illegal narcotics? Criminal! Rich, addicted to prescription narcotics? Rehab! #legitimaterapelogic

Muslim suicide bomber? Terrorism! Christian bombing a clinic that performs abortion? Martyr! #legitimaterapelogic

Cashmere sweater I'm sweatin

If I could time travel, yeah I'd kill Hitler, but there's also someone who invented Outlook.

WWE Raw so fucking racist

For a limited time only snapchats of me smoking drugs who want it

I just wanna know where the drugs and the hoes at

Throw every president except Reagan on that ass because as a stripper I think you'd disagree with his welfare policies

Grad school entrance requirements are the wild neck. Asking for letters of recommendation and other disrespectful shit

If I ever get rich I'm gonna become a client of my whitebread ass company and show up for meetings wilin in leggings and timbs

@_admiralawesome I have this disorder that makes the titles of movies like that appear as "Do Not Watch Pre-Menopause"

.@gerbermiami @theanonymousdj worst first impression, ever. Pic related: my face when rolling  http://lockerz.com/s/278369094 

@campo911 is my reminder that white kids from Cleveland area are vaguely ratchét

Diplo. So sexy, yet so not available for face sitting.

I really need to stop dressing like a fuckboy intern but they don't make Oxfords for huge titties

Also if you are willfully ignorant of history and your excuse is "History is boring" I'm going to pee on you while you sleep

Time to post a #thirsttrap, finally http://t.co/KqtViFyj

#Blackmagictwitterextendinglinks RT @campo911: #Equality RT “@la_straniera: Cause thats what yung (cont)  http://tl.gd/lsa433 

@ejaculates @twinkiehouse yolo tho

Smh RT @twinkiehouse @la_straniera Girls like to hear how beautiful they are, but guys are too scared of getting friendzoned to tell them