@laage's (Martin G) recently faved Tweets...
Me: “Wanna see who'll get nexted fastest on chatroulette?”
Colleague: “I've got some music that needs listening”
I think I just got nexted.
Colleague: “I've got some music that needs listening”
I think I just got nexted.
1
I saw an instructional diagram at the gym that said pull ups causes a rash on biceps, upper back and rear deltoids. But who would want that?
3
I've had it with you and your “that's actually quite bad for you”-attitude. Am I preaching while you cough blood? No! Lousy gym instructors.
5
“You're nice, if I didn't have a BF I'd date you!” She said.
He retired to the forest, patiently awaited one of them to leave the campsite.
He retired to the forest, patiently awaited one of them to leave the campsite.
2
#NationalGrammarDay. English is clearly not my first language. Thanks for not calling the Grammar Cops while I have my way with your tongue.
3
Every recommendation I've got on linkedin.com state that I'm “always working hard.”
To be honest, I don't know how I'm pulling this off.
To be honest, I don't know how I'm pulling this off.
2
Who do you go to if you've got a catchy tune stuck in your head, but can't remember from which porno you heard it?
I'm asking for a friend.
I'm asking for a friend.
11
“I am so scared, would you please hold me?” I quietly wept. “Go ahead and close Outlook,” He replied “you've been brave enough for one day.”
9
Aw, she left before I got to my name. Perhaps I should put it earlier in my song; possibly bring it up somewhere before the first interlude.
7
#ff @behindyourback. I once thought being passive aggressive was my forte, then he came along…
…who cares about excelling at that, anyway.
…who cares about excelling at that, anyway.
1
The plan:
1) Workout for an extended period of time. Build muscles;
2) Stop the workouts;
3) Get to know what touching breasts feels like.
1) Workout for an extended period of time. Build muscles;
2) Stop the workouts;
3) Get to know what touching breasts feels like.
6
It's been a while since anyone's done something for all of mankind.
The last time I recall was when I moved to Odense for all of your sins.
The last time I recall was when I moved to Odense for all of your sins.
5
Fun fact about me: So far I've dated girls from three different nationalities.*
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* Assuming Hell is a nation.
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* Assuming Hell is a nation.
9
“Come with me if you want to live.”
Apparently not a good pickup line.
Some girls haven't seen Terminator…nor have every jury.
Apparently
Apparently not a good pickup line.
Some girls haven't seen Terminator…nor have every jury.
Apparently
8
Whew, what a hangover.
Anyways; for this #musicmonday I'll recommend one of my favorite sludge western bands from Chicago, IL; Angel Eyes.
Anyways; for this #musicmonday I'll recommend one of my favorite sludge western bands from Chicago, IL; Angel Eyes.
1
“Hate writing these damn post-its” I sniveled. “let me” He said, wiped my tears and hugged me “It'll not make you any less of a scrummaster”
1
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