Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Playing Day Z, the hardest game ever, not to be confused with Jay Z, the hardest ever in the game.
I don't think I have the attention spam for movies anymore. I already don't care a lot.
Someone should invent a Cologne that doesn't burn when you spray it on your penis
I don't think I've ever been as sad as people who eat lunch alone in the car.
I had to quit smoking because my hands get so dry in the winter they're at-risk for wildfires.
If I died from diarrhea, nobody who knew me would be surprised. Myself included. There have been some close calls.
"You had me at YOLO" -Jerry Swaguire
Just walked into a bar to see a fat dude in a speedo giving an old lady a lap dance. Awesome
I'll never understand why old dudes are totally cool with using the urinal right next to another dude when EVERY OTHER URINAL IS AVAILABLE
So bragging about how far you ran. It's lame. There's a reason nobody ever made a super hero with the ability to jog at a comfortable pace.
If you have to lean on your shopping cart, I bet it doesn't have vegetables in it.
Get Black Metal Friday savings on corpsepaint, blast beats, and crippling despair!
Now please rise for the RC Cola National Anthem brought to you by Brown Derby