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People that are being fooled by the Bin Laden Facebook virus -- is this your first day using the Internet? You're adorable.
My box of wine in the empty passenger seat is triggering the "Child Seat Belt" reminder on my dashboard. Pulling over to write some poetry.
Completely non-ironic line from Law & Order SVU..
Ice T: "That's the coolest fort EVER!"
I don't think he knew they were filming him.
EYES: (to Brain) "There is a spider in the shower"
BRAIN: (to Body) "That spider just raped u & murdered everyone u kno. Panic accordingly."
FACT:After falling asleep next to a human, dogs increase their body temp to ~193°..causing what can only be described as Fart Craftsmanship.
Watching Lady Gaga's concert on HBO at my parents house - Grandma walked in right as Gaga yelled, "EVERYBODY GET YOUR DICKS OUT!" Yay!
If they made a show about the Febreeze commercial where they put blindfolded people in a serial killer-y house, I would watch every episode.
Nothing says, "I am violently unstable!" like impractically long fingernails.
Feeling your just-brushed-teeth with your tongue is some kind of sin, isn't it? It feels a little too good.
Tomorrow I'll tell you about the magical flying toasters and how they save your screen.
Mitchell & Webb as a robotic duo on Doctor Who? What god did I please?? <3
On the Shame scale: Being caught masturbating < Being caught licking the inside of a popcorn bag.
Hello, posterity. I write a column for http://Nerdist.com. It's sciencey and full of wonderful bullshit. I'm also a Research Specialist @ UPenn Med.