I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. #megaupload

I'm disappointed that @iamgreenfield didn't join his family on stage. Tugg Romney, where are you?

If JR Bourne has scenes with Gabriel Mann then it will be like all is right in the world and nothing will ever hurt again. #Revenge

Just saw the final scores & there are 21 girls with lower scores than Wieber who are in that final. What a load of shit. #Olympics

I guess @robdelaney has lost sight of the fact that beyond being 420 and Hitler's birthday, it is also Joey Lawrence's birthday. #whoa

Nick Nolte looks more like Kenny Rogers than Kenny Rogers does these days.

Everyone in the Hamptons is so thin because they never get to finish dinner. #Revenge

Watching Leslie watch a focus group is like being in fandom & tracking an anonmeme. #parksandrec

"Dogs can be sarcastic too. It's not just for cats." #SNL

Sometimes I can't believe "I'm Sexy & I Know It" is an actual song. But thank God it is. The world needs this right now.

DO NOT BLOW KISSES AT ME ASSHAT. That does not make you any less boring or turn you into an "artist". #plushenkomakesmebarf

The West Wing references in tonight's #Psych make me SO happy. SORRY CHARLIE.

@regularvowel Bless you, my child. (idk, is that how God would talk?)

Like you can always tell the Sorbs' double because his hair isn't as shiny and smooth. Conditioner man! #hercules

FUTURE MRS TIGER WOODS #parksandrec

License plate in front of me: GODSLAW. I genuinely thought it was God Slaw & I can't stop laughing about it.

That last RT was for @stackalees & @falulatonks and me.

GARCIA REFERRED TO MORGAN'S MOM AS HER FUTURE MOTHER-IN-LAW. WHAT IS THIS SHOW. JFC. #CriminalMinds

I continue to be concerned with how Rachel Weisz isn't aging.

God, how I wish I could block all tweets related to FMM. NO OFFENSE?????