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Legally no one can label you as having an addiction if you look marvelous doing it.
Next on "America's Most Delusional" you'll see people appointing a VP without being nominated, women thinking they can be president & Trump.
My boobs are perfect, I don't have to make sense.
I'm not saying I'm Mother Theresa or anything, but once I did something nice for someone and didn't post a picture of it online.
The avocado sticking it's tongue out emoji is the only evidence you'll ever need that God exists.
If you text me with the wrong emojis, we can't be friends. Sorry but I've become accustomed to a certain way of life.
And to think, before the Internet, when you didn't like someone, you just got over it and went on living your life.
Sometimes I think my life is going great and other times I'm not having sex.
How badly a guy was rejected by a girl is directly proportional to the length of the blog he writes about her.
Don't flatter yourself. She's not a catfish if she's going out of her way to NOT fuck you.
Make sure to spend all of your time judging others so you never have to look at what shambles your own life is in.
People regularly getting laid don't give a fuck what a stranger online is doing.
What's the most important thing you've done this year?
Me: Not killed anyone for having different political views.
You might need to take a tiny break from the Internet when you can't even handle a 140 characters without an embarrassing public outrage.
Congratulations! If you're arguing online with an Internet stranger, you've just failed at life!
Hillary Clinton needs to stop reminding everyone she is a woman. Literally no one wants to have a visual of her vagina in their head.
The sooner you realize nothing matters and everyone dies in the end, the sooner you'll stop acting like being a full time bitch is your job.
I can't wait for Trump to be President just to watch some of you lose your fucking minds.
I'm a living doll. MD as llvvzz on social media. Instagram/Facebook/Snapchat/Periscope: llvvzz
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