#YouKnowYourInLoveWhen FOR FUCKS SAKE, THIS HASHTAG ISN'T EVEN SPELLED CORRECTLY, YOU BUNCH OF FUCKING MORONS

@mrsselfdestrukt Give a man a wife, and all of a sudden he has no time for any of those things

The thing I like about Facebook is that it makes you fuckers sound interesting

Remember all those times I said I hate my life? This time I mean it motherfuckers!

Hey, pornstars! When you tweet with no pic attached, we don't even look at the text

These are funny when drunk, sober and on prescription medications #ff @_hellacious_ @essbeegee @tonyplownut @dogmanal @dutt81 @fingduck

Slept in this morning. Didn't even get time to masturbate/cry before getting out of bed.

Look at me! Don't you fucking look at me!

@frankstalicious

WHAT DO WE WANT?
MORE RIGHTS FOR TOURETTE'S SUFFERERS!
WHEN DO WE WANT IT?
CUNTS!

Thanks to @mrst4rkey

If he says "theoretically" one more time I'm going to take his kidneys out with a biro

I wish I could shoot lasers out of my weewee hole.

Fuck this place. Fuck everyone in it. Fuck it to Hell.

Ready for a beer now

I like Aliens cuz its all military and shit

I want to punch a penguin in the fucking face

Not enough fuckin red wine in the world for me

Going out for Mexican for lunch. My ring is already shredded to ribbons, it's going to be like a bloody mist by tonight

I don't trust penguins. At all. I mean, look at how they walk. Pricks.

HEY LADIEZ #shittytweetclub

Have to go to work today, gotta put food on the table LOL #shittytweetclub