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Jerk chicken is just regular chicken that's scared of commitment
Single Girl Valentines Day Simulator:
1. Dress nicely
2. Buy flowers
3. Light candles
4. Knock candle over so firemen have to come save you
Definition: important sports
Use: to describe an event in sports so important that your bf can't hear you anymore.
date a tall guy to ensure he always sees you from the perfect selfie angle
Don't be too fun or he'll think you want him but don't be no fun or he'll think you're a bitch basically don't leave your house
when your boss asks you if you 'have a sec', don't tell them you 'have a lot of secs'.
more hand holding, less phone holding
Everyone going to Game 5 in Van tmrw should take notes from the enthusiastic Jets crowd. THAT'S how you support your team when they're down.
WAKE THE FUCK UP CANADA. IT'S GO TIME.
To the guy buying the cheapest clearance condoms at shoppers: happy Father's Day
I wish Boxing Day meant you could punch people without getting arrested
I forgot to bring my own bags to the grocery store so now I have to move out of Vancouver and change my name
Do sloppy seconds taste the same as sloppy joes? Asking for a friend
Cake. Art. Emily Carr U. Mt Pleasant. Excessively happy. Much mush. Nibs. Glitter. Love. uses Twitter to question humanity.
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