This job ad is the equivalent of your grandparents trying to record the outgoing answering machine message:  http://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/ofc/3774684960.html …

F**k What Women Want #RepublicanMovies

Do people with protected twitter accounts just tweet their social security number and mom's maiden name all day?

#DepressingToys Custody Battleship

Saving Private Sector #RepublicanMovies

I was worried I'd have to wait till Thanksgiving to see an old man yell at a chair. #RNC

Belittle Women #mitterature

Full House Arrest #DepressingSitcoms

Looks like Kim let Kanye finish. #sorry

Nothing warms my heart like old rich white dudes being denied something they want.

#SadDrSeuss Oh, The $ You'll Owe

#RejectedScoutBadges vajazzling

#Popecopter The Pope shed a tear when he saw that BJ Hunnicutt spelled out "AMEN" in stones.

Ten bucks says we see the iPod playlist before we ever see the tax return. #RNC

I'm not trying to brag, but I still fit into my binder from high school.

Only 3 things in life are certain: death, taxes and the inevitable regret over your decision to read the comments.

While we're all (rightfully) discussing gun control, let's not forget our country's failings in healthcare re: treating the mentally ill.

Law and Order: Small Claims Court #UnwantedSpinoffs

Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives Within His Means #BoringHorrorMovies

#RejectedScoutBadges Ghost riding the whip