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@markusbrutus' (Mark) most faved Tweets...
markusbrutus
It was awfully nice of Kanye to let 2009 finish.
@markusbrutus
markusbrutus
Mirror mirror on the wall, in the dark you appeared to be a hall.
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markusbrutus
The hardest part about learning how to swim was figuring out how to open the burlap sack from the inside.
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markusbrutus
I think I'll watch a movie where Denzel Washington has a gun and becomes upset with someone at some point.
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markusbrutus
Man, these pumps aren't _exactly_ flattering, but, I'm SO tall now.
@markusbrutus
markusbrutus
If you name your daughter Chastity, you are likely setting yourself up for disappointment.
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markusbrutus
I think you may have used apathy in the wrong context, not that it matters.
@markusbrutus
markusbrutus
In third grade handwriting class I calmly asked the hot teaching assistant if my "but" looked good.
@markusbrutus
markusbrutus
I have to say, the instrructions for this "self-lobotomy" kit are intimidating as hell. Nevermind, I think we're gggggggg
@markusbrutus
markusbrutus
If you liked then you should have put a lid on it. #leftovers
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markusbrutus
6 more DM's and this slot machine should finally pay out.
@markusbrutus
markusbrutus
Is "I'm not certain you're ready for that" an appropriate response to "May I search your vehicle?"
@markusbrutus
markusbrutus
You could play a very mean joke on a skydiver if you had a GIANT low resolution topography map.
@markusbrutus
markusbrutus
If Nickelback ever covers Jimi Hendrix I will, personally, destroy the universe.
@markusbrutus
markusbrutus
Is "Bong Jovial" already a cover band name?
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markusbrutus
Something is technically wrong with my ability to generate content. Please check back another time.
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markusbrutus
For those about to rock: Keep it to a minimum, I'm still not 100%.
@markusbrutus
markusbrutus
Ok, White Rabbit, I'm cool with following you but, you have _got_ to stop screwing every rabbit we see along the way, seriously.
@markusbrutus
markusbrutus
I'm awfully proud of myself for not allowing my lack of creativity fuck with my lack of motivation today. This takes talent folks.
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markusbrutus
Oh, Listerine, you sadistic mistress.
@markusbrutus
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