Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
PROTIP (today only): Make a cross on your forehead with the ashes from your ashtray. Show up to work two hours late.
Sexually attracted to fire
Taco Cat spelled backwards is still Taco Cat
I'm wearing a polo shirt today and it's freaking me out.
"It's over between you and I." - "You mean between 'you and me.'" - "Yeah, well that's one of the reasons why."
"Hey, buddy, are you alright? I think you've had enough," the waitress says as I'm slumped over my plate during Star Pizza's lunch buffet.
I'm pretty sure that
My mom's place got named as one of the Top 10 Tex-Mex Restaurants in the country by @usatoday http://www.usatoday.com/story/travel/destinations/10greatplaces/2013/05/02/10-great-places-cinco-de-mayo-mexican-restaurants-usa/2130503/ …
There's 3 things Rick Perry doesn't understand.
Women, science, and.... I forgot the third.
Something about "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to eat brie"
WINDOWS DOWN, NPR UP!!! JUST 'CAUSE I DONT GIVE A FUUUUUUUU!!!
I feel sorry for people who aren't us.
THE INTERNET: where everything is, except food, and WE'RE WORKING ON THAT.
I've started up-charging for chile con queso by calling it Mexican fondue. People don't seem to be minding.
what would happen if there were a wall street shooting
My exclamation marks per email limit is three.
Let's play a game called "Is This Burning?"
I get paid to search Google. A Digital Bartleby. Huge nerd otherwise. Interested in all types of media & creative-ish forms of expressions. Rawr!!